Nipclub August 20th, 2026, Sekurity Update by Slinky, @Slinky_the_Cat, Sekurity Agent, Late Nite shift

It’s a Bacon party! Everything has bacon in it! And I mean everything! It’s glorious!

I walked into the Nipclub bar wearing my bacon suit and then had to change into my plain clothes bacon sekurity uniform. Moo and Mizz Bassie greeted me. There was a lively conversation going on about hotel bed quality. Moo brought me praline bacon tartlets and a cocktail with a large piece of crispy bacon as garnish.

Later, Pearl served maple bacon cupcakes and caffe lattes to those who needed caffeine. Pearl showed me the small golf course-sized hovercraft she rode in on; it had a giant stack of bacon in the back of it. It was something to behold! It was actually bacon-powered, so it even smelled like bacon (and catnip) outside the bar.

Angel Dominique, a.k.a. DC Kitty made a surprise appearance! She was chatting with everyone, making the rounds. We don’t see her often enough anymore, so it was really nice to catch up. Pearl kept the bacon tartlets, bacon-wrapped grilled shrimp, and champagne bacon cocktails flowing while we caught up.

DC was unaware of Pearl’s new dog plus feline companion. She also didn’t know her beloved ginger cat, Butter, had died. Consequently, more drinks accompanied several Butter anecdotes plus images.

Louis showed up for LATE NITE and asked if anyone was in the DJ booth. I hadn’t seen K-Boi or Sir LongPaw, so there was no music yet. Dominque talked about a newish cat food, Made By Nacho- chef-developed cat food by Bobby Flay. Apparently, it’s very tasty stuff and worth checking out the website! 

Louis was in the DJ booth which meant the real LATE NITE party started! Coldplay was the first cut, then Imagine Dragons, and more fun music. TJS arrived and said hello to everyone right as Dominique said goodbye.  We all hoped she would be back again soon!

Angus arrived and Louis hit his musical stride with some Mongolian metal by The Hu (A LATE NITE Nipclub favorite by now). Moo talked about cactus flowers, the monsoon in Jakku, and asked if my humans had any big storms near their home. Moo showed some photos of a trip to Costa Rica, including a photo of an anteater! Wow, it looked so cool! 

Pearl was knocking the food out of the park with flaming shots, bacon maple cheesecake, bacon s’mores, lasagna, and fruity cocktails. Angus and Louis chatted about music while Moo showed more tropical wildlife photos while we all drank bacon beer.  Fun times! 

Once Pearl’s barktender shift ended and she went home, I stepped in to serve cocktails and potato skins topped generously with bacon and scallions. Louis wound up his set and posted the set list on YouTube. Technology makes it easy to share!

Moo was fading and wanted an escort to her car. Louis, Angus and I were all fading too, so I packaged up some leftover bacon snacks for everyone to enjoy at home this weekend. It was time to go, so I cleaned up, locked up, turned on the closed sign, and headed back to my cloud.

Until next week!

Slinky the Cat

Nipclub August 6th, 2026, Sekurity Update by Slinky, @Slinky_the_Cat, Sekurity Agent, Late Nite shift

It’s Cover Song Night at Nipclub! Woot Woot!

I arrived to the smell of crispy fried fish, fries, and K-Boi at the bar. Gator, Mizz Bassie, Moo were there, and Moo had saved me some fish and chips.

Unfortunately, K-Boi had some bad news: his sisfur Ragamuffin has cancer and only has a couple of months left. Ragamuffin is a sekurity officer and has the shift right before me. This was devastating news to Nipclub. I gave K-Boi a hug. It started as a hurt paw that didn’t heal. Luckily, she’s on pain medication and at home with family. Everyone gave K-Boi hugs and healing vibes for Ragamuffin. 

We hung out, ate fish and chips, and I noticed Sir Pickle Long Paw wasn’t in the DJ booth. Probably just on a break, or maybe he wasn’t working tonight? I couldn’t remember. Sekurity was quiet tonight; we rarely have spam zombies anymore. K-Boi caught one earlier.

It was quiet, too quiet, but almost LATE NITE, so I zipped into the DJ booth and played a song, “Brandy”, a cover of the famous Looking Glass song by the Red Hot Chili Peppers. Then I played Sergio Mendes and Brazil’ 66 cover of “Fool on the Hill” by The Beetles. Had to keep the bar happy while we got LATE NITE going!

K-Boi was back in the DJ booth. He lined up his setlist and started with Jeff Buckley’s version of “Hallelujah”. Stunning!

Pearl had to leave earlier than normal, so I went behind the bar and worked with Moo making drinks and tacos. K-Boi played some great stuff: Johnny Cash covered a Nine Inch Nails tune, “Hurt”; a Patti Smith cover of “Gloria”, and the Cowboy Junkies cover of the classic “Sweet Jane” by The Velvet Underground.

He programmed 7 hours of music and shared the entire set list; it’s on YouTube!

Louis prepared to play tunes next. First up was a cover of an Elvis song by Robin Lee, and then Bananarama covered “Venus” (that’s not their original song; the original is from 1969, by a Dutch rock band called Shocking Blue), and I served more drinks!

Other than the music, it was pretty quiet! The cats were getting hungry, so I served French onion soup, pretzel bites, and various cocktails. Moo stayed late, and I walked her out to her waiting car. Louis, Angus, K-Boi and I were still there, so I served nightcaps like cognac and tiny blueberry tart desserts. Gotta have snacks when listening to Apocalyptica, Panthera, and Joan Jett covers!

At the end of the evening, I realized Angus, Louis, K-Boi, and I were all black cats and the only cats left. It’s a Void party!

TJS showed up again to say hello. Louis and Angus stayed to close the bar as they had more music to play, and I was getting tired. I walked outside and disappeared into a cloud of black smoke. 

Until next week!

Slinky the Cat

Nipclub July 16th, 2026, Sekurity Update by Slinky, @Slinky_the_Cat, Sekurity Agent, Late Nite shift

Nipclub was doing a night kayaking trip with lights in the water and under the boats; it’s called Glow Kayaking!

I dropped by the Nipclub bar, reached via the nearby river, shortly after returning from Mauna Kea’s peak. Moo and Pearl were there to greet me and asked about monsoon rain in Jakku. Pearl served up the sweet treats first: “glownuts”, donuts with neon frosting, and sparkly, glowing shots of something fun to drink.

Angus was there and looked good with his floofy fur growing back after his summer haircut. Moo asked about the different desert landscapes where Pearl and I live and showed us beautiful photos with giant saguaro cacti and storm clouds- definitely a scene from Jakku.

Mizz Bassie arrived, and we talked about well water vs. city water vs. rainwater. Rainwater is magical for plants, especially in the desert during the monsoon!

Angus, kayaking perhaps after consuming too many glow shots, tumbled out of his vessel! Luckily, he was wearing a life vest. He got right back in and was off down the river again! 

P and Jeego were out in their glass-bottomed kayak, enjoying the cool evening. Mizz Bassie was also in a cool kayak that looks like it’s lit from within. Grilled salmon steaks and cocktails all around while we continued weather talk and more kayaking.

Gator came back; apparently, he fell asleep. Just in time for LATE NITE! Gator departed soon thereafter because of his humans’ exhaustion from insufficient sleep. He mentioned the fires in Canada and how they are affecting the air where he lives; very hazy and smoky.

Pearl served a special chocolate cake with glow-in-the-dark frosting, and we were excited about how cool everything looked at the party. I mentioned that the cake appeared to have radium frosting, so I passed on the cake.

Mizz Bassie headed out early as her human hadn’t gotten enough sleep either.

LATE NITE was official as soon as Louis started playing his set list. He started off with some Rammstein, so I thought the theme was techno metal, nu metal, etc.

Moo also took off, so I escorted her to her car and went back out onto the dance floor. We talked about music, and Rammstein came up again; someone mentioned the song “Feuer Frei!” It’s the Rammstein song that opened the xXx 2002 action film. Pearl found the video for us to watch in the bar. It was so cool to watch again!

Louis also played Babymetal, a kawaii band from Japan, classic Nightwish, and more eclectic rock music.

Pearl served up blueberry crumble cheesecake and rose’ wine and turned the bar over to me for the last hour. I listened to Louis and Angus Tag team music while I put out a tray of tequila shots and some crispy potato skin appetizers- something savory.

Louis and Angus kept up with music, tipping kayaks, and I served coffee and cookies as a nightcap.

I had to close about 15 minutes early as I can’t always stay up furever! The human had to work early the next day. Louis and Angus probably played music in the parking lot into the wee hours….

Until next week!

Slinky the Cat

Nipclub July 9th, 2026, Sekurity Update by Slinky, @Slinky_the_Cat, Sekurity Agent, Late Nite shift

We’re skydiving tonight!

I jumped out of a plane right into the Nipclub parking lot! It was so cool. A couple of pals were jumping tandem right before I landed.

Alfie was in the DJ booth playing a splendid set of skydiving-themed tunes, including ones by Poly Styrene, Weezer, and Whitsett. Pearl served cookies with parachutes on them and blue sky-colored cocktails when I walked in.

We discussed those dreaded sky zombies, kind of like UAP’s only smaller. I zapped some with my laser!

Ragamuffin showed us her hurt paw, but it seemed survivable and was getting better after a vet trip and some medicine. Mizz Bassie and Angus were here, as well as the usual pals.

More snacks arrived that included little pretzel-bite pigs in a blanket that Gator made earlier, parachute beer, and delicious quesadillas with fresh pico de gallo.

Angus jumped out of a plane and was having a blast! He made about 5 or 6 jumps before LATE NITE started!

Gator experienced X difficulties: reaching a threshold, facing lockout, then regaining access. On and off invisibility! Gator said they’re having a heat wave at their house with high heat and humidity! Sounded awful.

Louis showed up talking about ducks again. It’s time for LATE NITE music about flying, and Louis switched with Alfie for DJ duties. He played more themed songs such as Steve Miller Band, Lenny Kravitz, and Ozzy Osbourne. Louis and Angus, such great friends, chatted about music nonstop in the DJ booth, and they were excited about each musical selection.

TJS showed up on time and greeted everyone.

With Gator still present, music played loudly, while Pearl provided us with cocktails and additional snacks. We enjoyed our conversation concerning music.

4PupDad showed up; we haven’t seen him for ages! What a pleasant surprise!

Gator lamented the loss of the free TweetDeck app when it was easy to pre-program music set lists and see all conversations at the same time. It was cool!

I remember using Hootsuite years ago when it was still free.

More snacks kept coming out of the kitchen: cheesecake cookies and Leap of Faith cocktails! Additional music flowed from many requests, with Louis and Gator contributing their own selections.

I made some song suggestions, and another pal we hadn’t seen for a while showed up, Amber and Precious!

We talked about state fairs with free or cheap concerts, the majestic Frisian horses, and other attractions at fairs such as SummerFest and the California State Fair in Sacramento. The free live music shows were the best.

After Pearl went home, I served Aviation cocktails and more pretzel piggies to the LATE NITE diehard crew. It seems like we never sleep!

The falling from the sky theme just kept going. They took the theme to the nth degree with Joe Satriani’s “Surfing with the Alien,” REM’s “Fall On Me,” and Patsy Cline’s “I Fall to Pieces,” and we were there for it!

Moo, Gator, Angus, Louis, and TJS were still there, and I was getting ready to wind it down, but the rest wanted to keep partying! I asked Gator or TJS if they could lock up this time.

I walked outside and floated away as they kept it going for another hour.

Until next week!

Slinky the Cat

Nipclub July 2nd, 2026, Sekurity Update by Slinky, @Slinky_the_Cat, Sekurity Agent, Late Nite shift

Area 51 party tonight! We know the truth is out there!

Sekurity dressed just like the actors in Men in Black. Gator and 21 others were already in the bar, drinking and carousing. Jeego and P were talking about Seafair (a traditional Seattle summer festival) and a July 4th fireworks display! Humans remembered it back in the day as mainly boat races and fireworks. Hydroplane races were the coolest. It was always a great time that created wonderful memories.

Mizz Bassie and Gator were here, and Gator showed off a photo of his new buddy, Koda the Catahoula mix dog. He’s very handsome! We watched the sky, and I looked for suspicious activity. So far, I’d seen orbs flying around the bar outside.

Pearl served grilled salmon and alien shot drinks inspired by the film Alien. She made me a plate as I downed a Xenomorph blood cocktail shot and went outside. I looked for evidence of any close encounters, such as crop circles or tiny grey creatures running around.

I saw some cows beaming up, so I zapped the ships with my sekurity laser, and they let the cows go, gently letting them land on the ground again before lumbering off. The ships sped away, leaving no trace. At least the cows were unharmed.

Back in the bar, I finished my salmon, and Louis announced an alien and UFO-themed playlist! Time to kick off LATE NITE the Area 51 way!

Pearl served flying saucer pasta and purple butter and some superb green cocktails in sparkly glasses. Louis was in the DJ booth and started off with a cover of Smooth Criminal by Alien Ant Farm! It’s a ‘90s classic! He played fun music such as The Steve Miller Band and Black Sabbath, while we ate space burgers with crazy cocktails!

We danced like crazy while Louis and Angus kept up the tunes. I had a song request, a ska song by an obscure band, and Louis found it! Martian Girl! by the Aquabats. I requested another song, Goo Goo Muck by The Cramps, to mix things up, and Louis played it. He had not heard of it before!

Pearl left, which left me in control of the bar until closing. More music such as Jefferson Starship and Rob Zombie, while I served alien green cocktails and green tea eggs that looked like alien pods, plus lobster mac and cheese, as you must have some normal-looking food sometimes!

Louis played alien-themed songs interspersed with a few patriotic songs to celebrate the upcoming 250 Years of Independence. TJS showed up again towards the end of LATE NITE for some dancing. We wound it down with dessert: red velvet cake-cheesecake squares with fresh blueberries in anticipation of this holiday weekend, with some Irish coffee shots.

I set everyone up with to-go bags of alien cookies, cheesecake squares, and other snacks and sent them on their way before I set the alarm, locked up, and tipped my hat toward our alien friends in the skies. 

Until next week!

Slinky the Cat