Nipclub, December 18, 2025 Sekurity Update

Thursday, Dec. 18th, Nipclub. It was a Brunchmas Pawty theme, which was the purrfect pawty for all the weary souls trying to get everything done before Christmas! The pawty had a somber beginning as Pearl (@Tinypearl) beloved fluffy orange cat, Butterscotch, had gone over the rainbow bridge. They dedicated the party to her memory. Panfur Louis (@psiangelic) is filling in at the bar for Pearl so she can be with her family.

Upon parking the spaceship, I caught an intruder close to the parking zone entrance. DJ K-Boi @Kittydaboi has the night off, so Gator (@RealFakeGator) said we might have an open mic. Moo (@moothemousecat) was feeling a bit harried, and P and Jeego (@SeattleP) were watching the Seahawks play the Rams in the Sports Lounge, hoping the Seahawks would win, of course. Apparently, the Seahawks aren’t playing well. (They ended up winning!) 

Moo and I are having a cocktail together while I watch through the window, ever diligent in my search for security risks. I spotted an interloper right outside. It’s been a silent evening so far, with not much to report. Raven (@Indulgedfurries) showed up with a gorgeous photo of Cosmo the pup and Butterscotch together. Cosmo went OTRB recently as well. It’s tough to lose two anipals so close together. We’re sending Pearl good energy. We’re just hanging out, not talking much, while I watch the Sekurity system video feed on my phone, just in case a spammer shows up. My taser is ready just in case the need arises, but I’m feeling subdued tonight.

Caught another sekurity risk right after the toast to Butterscotch and Pearl. Got him with my taser, and he folded like a cheap Temu lawn chair. I put him in our jail cell and went back inside the bar. There were luscious chocolate mousse cakes and vibrant red poinsettia cocktails waiting, while a few friends came in and out.

Finishing the evening, Louis presented a spectacular Brunchmas buffet; I sought a to-go container as I departed. Leftover noms for tomorrow! Sekurity risks captured tonight: Three.

Until next week.

Slinky (@Slinky_the_Cat)

TJ and Bart: Christmas Tree!

Bart: Good evening, Anipal Times readers! Here we are, TJ and Bart!

I’m Bart. Why is your name always first, TJ?

TJ: Dis is TJ. Bart, what difference does dat make? I think it’s because I’se a better-looking doggo.

Bart: WHAT????

TJ: Never mind, Bart. Let’s get to our subject tonight. Christmas trees.

Bart: Dis is a very important subject. Chwistmas Twees are stwange to us doggos

TJ: Yes, stwange. I mean, when we go outside to be walked, our hoomans know what we do with twees.

Bart: And our hoomans like it when we do dis. But not with dese Chwistmas trees.

TJ: Dat is stwange. And why are dese twees brought inside da house?

Bart: And da humans put all this stuff on it. Dey put decowations and lights on da twee, which is stwange. They never put dis stuff on twees outside.

TJ: And they put this…little barn with these plastic figures on it. Dey say dis is da baby Jesus.

Bart: It’s da weason for da season. Twees look nice. But when we go around dese Chwistmas twees, hooomans get nervous. Why?

TJ: Don’t dey know that we going dere to make a wish to Santa? For us to get more tweats for Chwistmas?

Bart: I mean, we had ‘accidents’ dere once or twice, but no one is perfect!

TJ: Dat wight! Okay, let’s close.

Doggos, just be careful when your hoomans bring in da Chwistmas twees. But, it’s still okay to have fun.

MEWWWY Christmas from TJ and Bart!

Flying With Lucky

Flying with Lucky#TheAviators Festive Flight Turns into a Rescue Mission!

Hello everyone. Welcome to flying with Lucky, where I keep you up to date on happenings with #TheAviators flying club. I have been a club member for 12 years; 5 of those years as the leader.

On Sunday, December 14th, #TheAviators took off on their annual festive flight from Toddy Furrington Airport in Bearford.

The flight began with Captain Rocky nicking my flask of tequila for a little liquid courage. (I taught him right). A large group of doggos and meowers took to the skies over Bearford and jetted 10 days into the future. The Christmas Eve tour headed southeast to London. The lights of Piccadilly were spectacular.

The tour went to Dublin, where people spotted leprechauns hanging Christmas lights along the streets. The Little People sure know how to paint the town green. One supersonic flight over the Atlantic Ocean, and #TheAviators were in New York City.

Once in New York, the distress alarm sounded off in Captain Rocky’s cockpit. Santa Claus, the jolly old elf, was trapped, which put Christmas in jeopardy. The brave pilots of #TheAviators converged on Santa’s last known position to find him stuck in a chimney. #TheAviators saved Christmas by pulling Santa and his sack of toys out of the chimney.

The next scheduled flight for #TheAviators is the quarterly tribute flight in January. Search #TheAviators hashtag for more flight details.

Nipclub, December 11, 2025 Sekurity Update

Nipclub Ugly Sweater Night

(By Slinky @slinky_the_cat, Sekurity Agent, Late Nite Shift)

I arrived on time. Ragamuffin Raspberry Tart (@sisfurcats) had nothing significant to report. She has the Sekurity Shift right before mine.

I saw Susan and Puddin (@georgiarealist), and Moo @(moothemousecat) had a martini waiting for me when I arrived. TJS (@TJS12145) and Dora K @ (dora_nlk) also were there. Gator (@RealFakeGator) said there were not a lot of security issues so far this evening.

After the last few weeks of craziness, this was most welcome!

I said hello to Louis and Heath (@psiangelic); I mentioned tequila fountains and martini Jacuzzis! Wouldn’t that be fun? We used to make a lot of tequila fountains!

I caught two interlopers out by the delivery entrance. I zip-tied them and locked them up. Easy peasy!

Gator was showing off his ugly sweater; it’s a sweater so heinous that it’s difficult to describe. A fire-breathing kitten setting a Christmas tree on fire, plus skulls wearing Santa hats. Truly a Design by Gator original!

Mizz Bassie (@MizzBassie) was here, and everyone was eating crispy onion rings and talking about the weather, snow, etc. Mizz and I have nice weather; she’s in Florida, and I’m in Jakku. We love nice weather in the winter!

Even Harvey Button (@HarveyButtonNZ) showed up! He doesn’t come into the bar often during the late hours, so it was a treat.

Pearl’s here now, after arriving a bit late because she had no electricity. She served up sweater-shaped cookies and cranberry meowmosas.

I took the golf cart out on the grounds to look for more sekurity risks, but it was quiet. Maybe too quiet. It was a slow night, which was fine by the Sekurity team. More time to party with the pals.

There was a delicious bacon lattice-topped apple pie. The stuff of dreams! That pie recipe should win a prize, like the noble feast prize, according to Sir Pickle (@SirLongpaw)!

I didn’t see Raven (@IndulgedFurries), so Pearl melted some butter, but then Raven showed up! She was having Twitter issues and wasn’t seeing notifications. We were rating butter, bacon, and chocolate in order of awesomeness. Together, they are purvana, declared Sir Pickle!

We talked about cat toys, toy dangers such as rubber bands, hair ties, etc. Then Vampy (@adorabully) showed up late to say hello. It’s nice to see everyone at Nipclub. I caught two interlopers, so it was not bad for an Ugly Sweater night!

Until next week

Betty and Rita Go To Paris by Judith E. Hughes

Wavy Paws. Today, I am reviewing a picture book travelogue for Meet Me At The Bookshelf called Betty and Rita Go to Paris with Text by Judith E. Hughes and Photographs by Michael Malyszko.

Ah, Paris. What could be better?

The French Crown Jewels, you say?

A little robbery at the Louvre, you say.

No, indeed. Just feast your eyes on the 84 pages of the City of Lights as seen by two adorable black labradors, Betty, age 11, and Rita, age 7.

Woof, what? You saw a picture of Betty and Rita lingering outside the Louvre?

*Cough* Well, page 26, right? They look thrilled there.

Um, no.

No one they know planned that heist. This is way before that event.

This 1999 book is a gorgeous photo journal instead; indeed, it’s a love note to dogs and travel.

I give it five paws way up.

Paris lends itself to great photography. These top dogs enliven Paris, featuring joyous photos alongside poetic writings within the pages. You will dream of big-city lights and your own furry friend.

Did you ever wish you could see Jim Morrison’s grave with your peeps?

Enjoy the Eiffel Tower all lit up at night?

Do you ever want to see the original Notre Dame Cathedral?

Sniff out a Hunchback or a baguette?

I do. I think books transport us into worlds we would love to explore. You may reside in Paris briefly, nods, if you suspend reality.

Sort of like you must suspend disbelief when the peeps tell you your dinner bowl is late, da nerve, because of a random “time change.”

As we move into fall and my favorite season, winter with all the snow, we like to look at this book to inspire my pup outings.

My momma reads this lovely book aloud to me and did it for all my sisfurs before me. In fact, my biggest sisfur, woo do not know her, she got to travel with my peeps to Paris, nod, nod. Her picture gives me joy, picturing them present in April, with budding trees, my dish full, on schedule, dear woman.

Oh, I digress. 

Betty and Rita pose at all the most important Parisian places.

My crucial locale, however, exists here, alongside Momma.

Betty and Rita, like all pups, pose while eating, romping, wrestling, and leaping about in fountains. They no doubt got treats for all the posing *looks longingly at my dinner bowl*.

I loved these two Labradors, and I know you will too.

Ooh look, dinner is here. Gotta run. See you next time when you Meet Me At The Bookshelf.

Wuv You.

My Mom’s Christmas Puppy

As Christmas is a time that spreads so much joy, I’d like to tell you a heartwarming story about my mom and her Christmas dog, Tilly.

Tilly’s story, set in 2006, is nearly twenty years old. 

So, in came Tilly! A half-dachshund, half-Bichon Frisé, with an adorable scruffy appearance that was the color of wheat, nibbled on my coat buttons throughout the entire car ride home on the night my dad and I welcomed her into the family. 

We planned to keep her presence a secret for a couple of weeks until Christmas, as it was already December 13th, so we sneaked her in.

My mother’s access to my room or office by stairs became impossible because of a car wreck. The plan, thus, was to keep Tilly upstairs: fed, cuddled, entertained, plus, above all, quiet. 

We were unaware, but Tilly had other ideas. 

A very large and tall J.C. Penney box, open at the top with the top flaps cut off, and with a blanket and toys inside, served as a puppy playpen. The second her paws touched the blanket at the bottom, she started whining. I tried to hush her gently, and she answered with louder protests. Of course, I had her wandering around upstairs initially, but when she tried to befriend my rabbit, he ended up stomping his back feet at her, which made her run and yelp with fright out of my office, around the corner, and into my room.

Because I thought she might be lonely, I took the “playpen” with me wherever I went. Nothing doing. 

To reassure her she wasn’t alone, I tried cuddling her for a long time. 

While she was in the “playpen”, I tried giving her treats and playing with her. 

I turned on the radio for her. 

Even with the “playpen” beside my bed while I tried to sleep, she kept whining all night. 

I’d reach over and pet her, and she’d stop when I did. Then I’d roll over, and she’d start up again. 

I couldn’t let her onto the bed with me. She was such a tiny bean; I was afraid I’d roll over and squish her. So, instead, I spent the night alternating between petting and comforting her and her serenading me with her cries. 

In the morning, I went downstairs, knowing my mom had heard Tilly and that she had ruined the surprise. 

My mom couldn’t figure out why I looked so terrible. 

I couldn’t figure out why she wasn’t asking me about the whining echoing down the stairwell. 

Still, she hadn’t heard! She didn’t know! 

There was no way I could keep Tilly a secret for another twelve days, so I brought her downstairs to my mom, saying, “Merry Christmas!” 

My mom lit up like a little kid at Christmas. She was so excited, and Tilly was so excited, and I was excited but also exhausted. 

My mom said she couldn’t believe we’d snuck Tilly in and kept her quiet all night! I answered that we hadn’t and told her about my sleepless night. 

She was even more surprised. 

My mom lowered Tilly into her playpen to go to the kitchen. 

And this time Tilly didn’t whine. Instead, she Tigger-bounced off her back legs, grabbed hold of the handle that was cut into the side of the box with her front paws, lifted herself up like she was about to do a pull-up, and squeezed herself out of the handle, plopping onto the floor with a tiny thump. 

She rose to her feet and wandered over to my mom, head held high. 

Turns out, this was a preview of the next ten years: Tilly doing high-dives off the back of the couch, leaping over baby gates and furniture, running up vet bills and giving us minor cardiac arrest regularly, no matter the measures taken to stop the furry little Evel Knievel. 

But through it all, we loved her, and she loved us. She was my mom’s very own special Christmas puppy.

TJ and Bart: Tail Sniffing

Bart: Hewwo, Anipal Times Readers! This is Bart, and we, TJ and Bart, are ready to write another column.

TJ: Dis is TJ, and dis is an important column. Doggos have asked us dis question: Why do our humans become upset when we sniff each other’s tails?

Bart: It is stwange, TJ. What is da problem with them?

TJ: They do not know dat is how we greet each other! We check each other out when we do dat! But humans just get all weird about it.

Bart: Hoomans, y’all do weird things too, like when we poop outside, y’all gather it in paper bags. Why do you want to save our poop?

TJ: I never figured dat one out, Bart.

Bart: Hoomans are strange. Anyway, for you hoomans, when we sniff each other’s tails, it’s our way of saying hello.

TJ: You can tell a lot about a doggo by sniffing its tail.

Bart: Exactly. You know den if you can twust da other dog. If you smell da wong thing, it’s no good

TJ: Dis is how we bweak da ice at da dog parks. Other doggos can be nervous, but when we sniff their tails, it rewaxes dem.

Bart: Dat’s wight. So, for you doggos, be patient with your humans. Dey are stwange.

TJ: And for humans, try to be more understanding. We will twy to be understanding with you.

Until next time. Woof woof!