Tag: Pet Advice Column

Get Off My Sidewalk

~ BOB W ~ 4 Comments

Well, ello efurryone I have just received a right dilemma in my inbox, I tell you …

“We have old and young alike riding electric bikes on the sidewalk in my area where I walk each day with my peeps. It scares me. I am just a wee thirty-pound dog. Am scared. Is there a leash I can get that glows in the dark? Can you suggest? Is there an air horn I can buy to blast at them so they move off and let me use the sidewalk? Can you suggest? Should I report them and make em mad at me? Please advise. SIGNED GET OFF MY SIDEWALK”

Oh, my dear pal, I quite understands. Gifting you a very big hug. Totally understandable when sumfing whizzes past you like those electric bikes.

Firstly, let’s say you are totally not being unreasonable. Ordinary bikes and electric bikes should not be on the sidewalk/pavement.

And I fink I can say I speaks fur all of us here – THE SIDEWALK/PAVEMENT IS FUR WALKIES, SNIFFIES AND FURRY IMPAWTANT PEEMAIL – NOT FUR PEEPS WHIZZING PAST AT A MILLION MILES PER HOUR!

But don’t worry, you dus not need to become Sheriff of the Sidewalk and be blasting an air horn at the cyclists!

In fact, I wud strongly advise against dat as it might frighten the cyclist who may lose control and dat mite frighten yous even more.

Your peeps is the key here.

Chats with your peeps and asks dem keeps you on a short, secure lead when you is sumwhere dem bikes dus appear.

And totally you can get glow-in – the – dark, reflective or LED collar, lead and/or harness that is a great idea – in particularly fur the early mornings and late nights. Choose summat to makes you easily seen.

Also if sumone repeatedly rides dangerously on the sidewalk and comes close to you or behaves aggressively, yes defo your peeps can report it. Dey do not haz confront demselves.

And impawtantly your peeps are not trouble makers fur reporting genuinely aggressive behaviour. Dey is looking afur you whos can’t speak up fur self.

If poss make a note of date, location, approx time if anyfing happens.

And memba my pal, you do not has make the bike peeps angry. Your peeps can deal with all that stuff.

You can simply walk next time by your peeps safely on sidewalk, sniff approx 4752 interesting sniffs and answers approx 3921 peemails.

And simply continue being your fabulous self.

Yours Woofly, Bob’s Your Uncle

Grooming – Can Mum Cut It?

~ BOB W ~ 2 Comments

Ello der my pals I dus have received a propa dilemma lets me tell you …

“Dear Uncle Bob. Hello my momma is wonderful. She generally has me groomed, but I generally tends to acts silly and may have been asked to show myself out. Momma has, like me, ginormous, bootiful hair. Should I let her style and cut mine? Taking a chance. Signed Anonymously Adorable in Colorado.”

Oh, dear Anonymously Adorable, what a hairy dilemma!

I understand your problem. Your momma has ginormous bootiful hair and naturally you be finkin – surely sum dat styling talent must be able to be used on me.

Howefur, dear pal, there cud be a little issue – dat being your grooming record. If you’ve already been asked to show yourself out by the professionals, I is not convinced entirely dat you shud hands the scissors ofur to your momma and say, ‘have a go’!

Dat said, I says take a chance on the styling but bite the cut fur now. Starts small and sees how goes. And den, if Momma proves herself, you cud gradually and slowly increase her grooming privileges.

And always memba dat fur grows back (usually)!

What does our readers finks?

From your Agony Uncle Bob